The Joy of Ferragosto and Life With Intention

Editor’s note: this post was originally published on Medium.com

It’s mid-August. In Italy, the country is on holiday. It’s planned. It’s anticipated, and it’s savored. The pinnacle of the month-long kick-back is August 15th, the public holiday of Ferragosto.

Being Italian, it conveniently coincides with the important Catholic feast of the Assumption of St. Mary.

Long before the Church took control of the calendar and the holidays, the Roman emperor Augustus introduced, in18 BCE, Feriae Augusti a late summer break after the extended period of intense summer labor in the fields.

A planned break after long labor: that’s living by intention.

Apparently not everyone can take August off. But everyone CAN (and does) take a day — August 15th — for a long lunch, copious wine and rest. That’s Ferragosto

In 2008, Italian filmmaker Gianni DiGregorio won “Best First Film” at the Venice Film Festival for this charming portrayal of a man caught in the vise of Ferragosto gone wrong.

In this spoof, the middle-aged son of an aging aristocratic mother is conned into looking after the mums of various others on this holiest of summer holidays.

Here’s the trailer.   And here’s how you can enjoy “Mid-August Lunch” yourself.

(affiliate link)

Everyone in the film, it appears, is living with Intention. Except for our hero, and yet, even he managed it in the end.


In America, we react to August and to life.

We Americans tend to take the latter half of August as it comes, with an eye to Autumn. We tend to start thinking about back-to-school, maybe the last beach trip. We tend to react to the close of summer, rather than celebrate it.

By the time Labor Day rolls around, we’ve circled back to summer: school has already started, the consumption cycle is all about Autumn. It’s the last hurrah. But still, it’s a reaction. It’s not living by intention.

We’re always forward-looking and reacting to what comes our way. Do we plan? Yes, for retirement, children’s education, a house, a car.

But I posit that as a society, we’re lousy at living by Intention.

The commitment to living by Intention

I’ve been troubled by this flopping around, reacting to everything. My life seems chaotic, putting out fires — metaphorically — in every aspect of my life.

It’s draining both physically and emotionally.

I was in this state of depletion when Benjamin P. Hardy’s article really resonated. It was this sub-head that hit me:

Getting out of Survival Mode

Wow, that’s me. Survival Mode. Okay, then.

The subconscious cycle, he explains, blurs the distinction between the body and the mind. We go on autopilot. We react.

I’m not so sure about the morning routine making me a millionaire. Actually, other factors must come into play for that to happen.

But I get his point. I get that living with intention takes conscious effort. It takes conscious effort to effect change in behavior.

I’m sold. I’m on the other side of 65, but I am convinced there are more (again, metaphorical) mountains to climb. I know what I’d like to become. I can see it.

But I’m often either too lazy or too frightened to step out of my very established comfort zone to go for it.

Here’s the 4–1–1: It won’t happen unless I break out of my own self-imposed jail.

It won’t happen unless I subject myself to the uncertainty and accept less predictability.

It won’t happen unless I accept the chance I won’t make it (except I know I will if I try).

Finally, It won’t happen unless I try stuff I’ve never done, explore the unknown. Simply put, the unknown is my vision.

I’m just scared.

Moving forward with Intention

I don’t want to hang the “Closed” sign on my life. Not yet.

I’m taking some of Ben’s suggestions to begin to organize my life around them.

I’m following the basics of his Evening and Morning routine. I can see early on that setting up the following day eliminates floundering; you merely get stuff done because you know what needs to be done.

I won’t do everything, of course. We each need to work this out for ourselves, for our personalities, for our objectives.

That said, I don’t want my life to be a series of random acts responding to stimuli. I want a plan, dammit!

And I am committed to doing new things. Going new places. At least once a week. Getting out of my head.

I’m seeing how organization can keep the nonsense crap from invading my purpose and intention.

I wrote recently about crabgrass and writing. Now I think it’s bigger than that. I don’t want the crabgrass of life to overtake my proverbial garden the garden being my hopes and dreams. My own “garden of desire.”

The Upshot

I want an intentional plan. It won’t necessarily guarantee success. But it won’t mitigate my chances, either.

It’s not over til the fat lady sings.

And this lady is just warming up. There’s another act to unfold.

So here’s to a good break in August. Here’s to Ferragosto. Cin Cin.

I’ll let you know how it goes.


2018 Copyright Jane Trombley  All rights reserved

3 Reasons Why Travel is More Important in Retirement

clock at Grand Central Terminal

Editor’s note: this post was first published on Medium

Travel is important at any time in life. Travel gets you out of your shell, your culture, your background, your self-imposed confines.

At a young age, travel exposes you to the world, whether across the state, across the country or around the globe.

Later in life, and particularly in retirement, time seems to speed up, to enter a different continuum. Travel seems more urgent, the experience is more alive and somehow, more profound.

The distance and the destination are not critical, it’s the fact that you’re doing it at all.

Travel in retirement keeps you sharp

You have lots of ways to spend your time and resources once you hit retirement. A trip is just one option. But it keeps you actively engaged in life’s “game.” Regardless of whether you choose a full package such as a tour or a cruise, or more independent travel, the dynamics are similar.

Travel takes you out of your comfort zone. It’s always about the new experience, even if it’s a place you’ve been to before. Travel is fresh, a dash of the unknown. In retirement, that’s an excellent thing. You didn’t retire to sit passively, did you? I didn’t think so.

Being out of your “comfort zone” doesn’t mean traipsing around the unknown. It just means putting a toe outside of your routine and widen the net of experience.

There are no foreign lands. It is the traveller only who is foreign.” — Robert Louis Stevenson

The upshot? Your comfort zone — the space you occupy in physical, mental and emotional states — just got bigger. Remember, there are no “foreign lands.”

Travel requires social and communication skills.

You need to interact with people you meet. That runs the gamut from service personnel, fellow travelers of your choosing or locals you meet along the way. You need to be able to communicate your needs and preferences. You’ll want to chat up your seat-mate on the tour, relive the day with your traveling companions (yes, even your spouse!), and discuss where-to next.

All this takes considerable cognitive power, social engagement and, sometimes, “attitude adjustment” (another term for patience).

Just keep your cool. You can do this. You’re not the old codger your children think you are.

Travel keeps you self-aware. When traveling you have a heightened awareness of your surroundings.

As the British-born author, Aldous Huxley famously said,

There are things known and there are things unknown, and in between are the doors of perception.

Travel in retirement is about keeping those “doors of perception” open, wide open, between the known and the unknown.

This is the best time of your life to explore your “unknowns.”

You have the luxury of unhurried time. It’s one of life’s greatest gifts.

Travel in retirement is a huge part of life-long learning

Life-long learning is not only huge, and travel in retirement makes it fun and actionable.

If you’ve researched your destination, figured out the best way to travel that suited your budget, interests, any limitations, that’s learning.

You can up your tech game: Did you learn at least a phrase in another language, thanks to an app like Duolingo? Did you download a travel app? Did you use Google Maps or some other direction-finding software to get from Point A to Point B?

What assumptions were challenged?

What did you come back knowing you didn’t know before? What “doors of perception” were opened as a result of your travel, or the preparation for it?

That’s life-long learning.

Travel in retirement gives you information and experiences to share.

Coming back from travel, you’re a different “you.” It’s nearly impossible to have a travel experience and not have something stick

Unless you’re like my Aunt Flo. She and Uncle Art traveled the world in retirement, thanks to his life-long career with United Air Lines.

She was the “Teflon traveler” because nothing, and I mean nothing, stuck.They would go on a whim, world-wide on trips with other United-retirees, and come back emotionally void from the experience.

“It was nice,” she’d say. But it didn’t penetrate, it didn’t stick. She didn’t feel it.

I am indebted to my aunt and uncle for my travel curiosity. They took me along on a tour to Scandinavia when I was 15, in the early 1960’s. By luck, some Australian girls my age were on the tour, too. We remained pen pals for decades, long before email. That interaction is still a sweet memory. It stuck.

Please don’t be like dear Aunt Flo. Make travel “stick.”

The Upshot

Let travel make you a more interesting person.
Travel doesn’t need to be far, or exotic. It needn’t be expensive. But the experience will make you a more interesting person. You’ll have more to talk about. Even pictures to share.

You’ll even have bragging rights.

And the best part? Travel in retirement emboldens you to do more.

So, where are you off to?

Photo credit: Jane Trombley

Walking the Dorset Coast: Here’s What You Need to Know

backpack on Southwest Coast Path, Dorset

Editor’s note: This post was published originally on Medium.

Dorset, like all of England, is a haven for walkers. It pairs fitness with some of the most idyllic scenery on earth. There is terrain to suit every fitness level and every quest for an aerobic challenge.

About two hours by train from London, Dorset combines aquamarine sea vistas with the pastoral beauty of Shakespeare’s “blessed plot.”

In a nation acutely aware of those blessings, a good bit of Dorset is designated as an AONB (Area of Outstanding Natural Beauty).

This coastal walk is part of the famed Southwest Coast Path, which in its entirety is 630 miles around the western tip of England.

Photo courtesy: https://www.nationaltrail.co.uk/south-west-coast-path

This 5-day stint covered the “Jurassic Coast” — from Lyme Regis to Lulworth Cove, beyond Weymouth — a total of about 45 miles.

Photo credit: Google Maps

Topline Tips

Plan, Plan, Plan!

The success of any hiking or walking trip the trip is defined by variables such as weather, trail conditions, the unforeseen injury. Mitigate any possible downside of the unexpected with a plan.

Winging it is good; I love on-the-fly. But I also like knowing where I’m going to lay my head each night, and how my luggage is going to get from point A to point B. There is enough drama and adventure on the trail.

Organize with a professional

Self-guided tour companies provide structure and guidance that takes the guesswork out of the experience.   Encounter Walking is a very professional provider.

When we got stuck along the trail, befuddled by the map the second day out, there was a phone number and a helpful voice at the other end.

When to go to Dorset

Mid-June which, despite an early heat wave, gave us the untrammeled beauty of early summer. That said, all the places in the northern hemisphere are lovely in September/October.  Dorset glows at that time of year.

However, the Dorset coast is a tourist magnet. High summer, July and especially August, is the ‘season’ so set your expectations: packed restaurants, impatient crowds, increasingly frazzled staff.

“Shoulder” seasons are highly recommended. Late autumn would be stunning.

What to expect in Dorset

  • Terrain — The maps/itinerary are very clear as to the difficulty of the topography. Most fall into the “mild” to “moderate” range with some steep patches. While the “ascent” is not remarkable, the long, slow climbs are challenging.
  • A good part of the trail leaving Lyme Regis is along the beach, under the famed Jurassic Coast cliffs. It makes for a pebbly, unstable ground underfoot, slow and tiring. This section is also stunningly beautiful, and it’s possible to pick up a fossil or two if you’re eagle-eyed.
  • Weather — Coastal weather is often fickle but, it’s important to understand that this walk is very exposed to the elements. There is little shade from the blazing sun, little protection from rain and wind.
  • Facilities — are few and far between on the trail. Be prepared if necessary, to “go” behind a dune or other secluded spot. As ever, good trail etiquette is “carry in/carry out” so, be prepared!
  • The trail runs through private pasture land. At points, you’ll be next to, or in some cases among, sheep or cattle.
Photo credit: Jane Trombley

It’s a very different concept to American hikers/walkers who would not dream of “trespassing” on private land. In the U.K. it is permissible. There is an unspoken pact with the cows: you leave them alone and they leave you alone.

Photo Credit: Jane Trombley

What to bring to Dorset

  • Maps/guides Maps/guides If you work with a comprehensive trip organizer, you’ll have a precise itinerary, essential phone numbers, general maps. The trail is well marked, so additional material (like the famous British Ordnance Survey maps) isn’t necessary.
  • Proper gear This is more than a “sneaker” walk; bring good quality, lightweight hiking boots. You’ll cover a range of terrain, from muddy pastures to pebbly beaches.
  • A good, comfortable backpack. Even though you’re just out for the day, you’ll need more than a “fanny pack.” Find a comfy, small backpack; the kind with the mesh holders for water, or other things you want handy, is a plus.
  • Snacks because nothing is worse than being hungry on the trail. Or, hitting lunchtime with no lunch in sight. Have protein bars, hard candy (chocolate melts), maybe an apple.
  • A walking stick is one of my necessities. I use a telescope model that fits into luggage for overseas flights. It helps with balance, getting over difficult terrain, and is as useful uphill as downhill. They are easy to find at outfitters; the good ones are pricey.
  • You need to be prepared for varying weather conditions: rain gear, shorts, long sleeve shirts, hats, sunglasses, sunscreen. If your luggage is transported daily you needn’t carry all this stuff. Having it with you means you can be prepared for any weather.
  • Tissues for a runny nose and for when nature calls. Small plastic bags with a “zip” closure for tissue storage until you reach a trash bin. Pre-moistened wipes are useful and take up little room. Bring insulated, refillable water bottles. It’s imperative to stay hydrated, and buying water along the trail is an annoyance.

Highlights of Walk, Lyme Regis to Lulworth Cove.

Lyme Regis

We started this adventure in Lyme Regis, spending a few days at this durable seaside resort. For well-heeled Londoners in the 19th Century, Lyme Regis was a “go-to” summer destination.

Photo credit: Jane Trombley

Jane Austen, author, and a frequent visitor captured the vibe in Persuasion when she wrote,

“A very strange stranger it must be, who does not see charms in the immediate environs of Lyme, to make him wish to know it better.”

It’s as true today as it was back then. Below, the garden path she was said to have strolled.

Photo credit: Jane Trombley

The town’s other claim to fame is being the epicenter of England’s early proving ground for the Evolution vs Creation debate, raging in 19th C intellectual circles.

Mary Anning (1799–1847), a self-educated fossil hunter and collector, was eventually credited with the first discovery of the plesiosaur, who roamed these parts during the Jurassic era. In her time, Mary endured intellectual and gender bias by the more “learned” men at the British Museum but now has her due.

Heading out

We left Lyme Regis, walking along the shoreline and up across the “Golden Cap” toward the town of Eype.

It was a strenuous 9 miles in scorching heat, with gorgeous views but no relief from the sun.  It was a relief to find this welcome sweet on the pillow at the hotel.

hard candy from Eypes Mouth Hotel

Ever Onward

Day 2 Eype to Abbotsbury an eleven mile stretch of easy to moderate terrain, but difficult underfoot on the pebbly beach.

Photo credit: Jane Trombley

Walking under the dramatic cliffs, but no fossils to be found.

Photo credit: Jane Trombley

Day 3 took us from Abbotsbury to Weymouth, thirteen miles over easy terrain. Here the challenge here was the lack of amenities: no rest stops or places to buy lunch. We were slower than planned, and should have anticipated the need to carry a sandwich. Live and learn. Snacks filled in. Water was crucial!

Photo credit: Jane Trombley

Weymouth was all the rage during the 18th C. reign of King George III. The Georgian architecture and graceful promenade along the shoreline tell the story of a luxurious bygone era. A bit faded, but with very good bones.

Today it’s a bit forlorn, bravely trying to regain its long-gone glamour.

Photo credit: Jane Trombley
  

Day 4, Weymouth to Lulworth Cove. It was a strenuous thirteen miles to Lulworth, but perhaps the most dramatic scenery of all. The highlight is the spectacular limestone arch known as the Durdle Door. The steep incline covering 1.25 miles or so is worth the slog.

Photo credit: Jane Trombley
Photo credit: Jane Trombley

The highlight is the spectacular limestone arch known as the Durdle Door. The steep incline covering 1.25 miles or so is worth the slog.

It’s where England could be mistaken for the Almafi Coast.

Lulworth is a charming town and in mid-June geared for the upcoming tourist season.

Photo credit: Jane Trombley
Photo Credit: Ann Savage
Photo credit: Jane Trombley
Photo credit: Jane Trombley

Lastly, who doesn’t love a place that loves dogs?

Photo credit: Jane Trombley

In the end, who doesn’t love a place that welcomes dogs?


2018  Copyright Jane Trombley  All rights reserved.
Note: This post contains some affiliate links, through which I may receive a small commission at no additional cost to you. 

It’s summer and that means travel…

It’s summer, and do you know what your plans are?  NO PLANS?!  You need Ideas!  So head on over to 3 Score’s Travel News page.

Food tours in Dublin, Cruise ideas (and bargains!), the ultimate list of travel essentials.

Get some ideas, get your essentials, and off you go!

Updating the Travel Page

travel brochures

 

All I can say is Mea Culpa.  I’ve been AWOL on the 3 Score Travel News Page.  For far too long.

But beginning today, it’s back with an update.  If you have been thinking about an Alaskan Cruise, it’s not too late to book for this summer or early fall.

And, Scout’s honor: I promise to keep it up with timely tidbits.  But I also promise not to share every airline horror story.  We’ve all seen enough of those.

 

Rheumatoid Arthritis? Here’s How to Have The Best Travel Experience

If you suffer from Rheumatoid Arthritis (RA), you know travel can be a challenge. But it doesn’t mean you’re stuck at home!

With the following pro tips, and proper RA management, the best of travel is there for you.

Quick Facts About RA

  • RA, disease of the auto-immune system commonly affecting joints in fingers, wrists, ankles, knees and joints.  It is a chronic condition, meaning it can “flare”  or recede.
  • Over a  million people in the U.S.are diagnosed with RA, predominately women. It  is most commonly detected in the prime travel years, between the ages of 40-60.
  • Curiously, RA is symmetrical; it affects joints on both sides of the body. With pain or stiffness in your right knee or ankle, chances are you’ll feel it in on your left side, too.
  • With treatment and self-care, traveling with RA is very manageable. So, pack your bags and book that adventure. An RA diagnosis doesn’t mean you can’t see the world!

Managing RA When Traveling

For solid advice, we turn to the experts in the video below.

Dr. Grace C. Wright, a noted Rheumatologist and  Clinical Associate Professor of Medicine at New York University’s Langone  School of Medicine.

With her is Maria an RA patient, sharing her experiences as a traveler with RA. Maria  has built a successful company and active lifestyle and wishes to be presented by first name only.

5 Top Tips for Travelers with RA

  • Stay hydrated!  Make sure you have a water bottle handy at all times, especially in dry conditions (such as long flights).
  • Get comfy!  Use a neck pillow, stretch out, get up and move around in a plane or train as soon as it is safe to do so.  Frequent rest stops while driving long distances will help keep stiffness at bay.
  • Rx: plenty of rest. A good sleep routine is very important!  Time changes can disrupt your sleep patterns, so use the first few days to get into a good sleep rhythm.
  • Balance exercise and rest. In addition to a good night’s sleep, be sure to balance rest and exercise. It’s easy, when traveling, to push onward to that next shop, the next museum.  Schedule rest periods during the day, to help manage joint inflammation when walking.
  • Warm/cold therapies.  As Maria notes in the interviews, a warm soak can work wonders when traveling. Heat, or massage, will serve to reduce minor inflammation. Cold therapies such as an ice bag, will help relieve more acute pain and inflammation.

The Upshot: RA?  So what?

Choose your destination and safe travels!

 

© 2018  Jane Trombley

 

 

The 3 most important reasons to travel solo at 60+

We get to retirement, or close, and the siren song of travel beckons. But to travel solo?

Finally, the planets are aligned: time, treasure (ok, budget treasure), and a talent for discovery. We want to go, and yet lingering doubt perceived roadblocks. No one wants to go where you want to go.

A travel partner becomes unable to go.A recent loss alters the course of your life, not to mention travel plans.

It doesn’t take much to upend rickety self-confidence.

“Travel solo at my age? I don’t think so.” So goes the refrain in your head.

Try this refrain instead:”Travel solo at my age? Why the hell not?!”

Need some reasons to pack those bags? Read on.

You set the budget

If you want to go luxury, then go luxury. Some of the best travel I’ve done has been on a more restrained budget, allowing me to see more of the “real” destination, not just a fancy hotel.

Perhaps counter-intuitive, but true in my experience.

Tour companies and travel agents are happy to accommodate you and mix and match to meet your budget. Often, they will cite a “base price,” and you can tweak from there.

A firm I’ve used, and heartily recommend for their customization, is Yampu Tours. They offer a wealth of travel experiences, at every price point.

The best part? A travel consultant pop-up window will greet you on their website. Honestly, it’s a chance to talk to a real human about what you might want to do, where you might like go. Even if you have no real idea.

Another tour company that specializes in solo women travelers is Overseas Adventure Travel. And the dreaded single supplement? Nope, gone.

You set the destination

Think about it — there are probably 3–4 (ok, maybe more) places you’ve secretly wanted to go. For a variety of reasons it didn’t work: no interest from spouse, friend, family. No time. You put it off.

That’s what I’m here to say: in your 60’s the “putting it off” is no longer a valid excuse.

Now, my friend is your time. So think about that place you’ve always wanted to go because the help is there to make it happen.

You set the itinerary

Maybe the best part of travel at 60+, and particularly a solo journey, is that you needn’t answer to anyone. If you want to spa, go for it. Tours, soaking up the local culture, language classes.

Introduce yourself to the world. It is waiting to meet you.

If you want an immersive activity, it’s there, too. I like Yampu’s approach to immersive travel and their volunteer opportunities in particular.

It needn’t be the entire trip, but if the opportunity to interact with the local population — and with children, especially — resonates with you, there are ample opportunities to fold that into your experience.

It’s just one of the many advantages of solo travel. Your trip, your terms.

Is solo travel the ultimate self-indulgence?

Some would say so. I’d say that by the time you’ve reached your early 60’s you’ve earned the right to make your own decisions. Chart your course.

This doesn’t mean you are abandoning your family or your commitment to those things important to your life.

It does mean that you are answering to your self, to your wishes, and perhaps to the fulfillment of a life’s dream.It’s not selfishness, it’s self-affirmation.

It does mean that you are bold enough, confident enough to strike out on your own.

Good for you!

Take that kernel of self-truth, listen to your inner voice that says, “I’d like to see Hawaii” and book it. Rarely, if ever, does your intuition lie.

It comes down to this:

If the choice is between going solo and not going at all, there is only one answer: book the trip.

And please become a 3 Score Traveler by posting a photo on Instagram: @3scoreandmore.

In the meantime, let me know how the planning goes.
Cheers,
Jane
Copyright 2018  3 Score & More  All rights reserved
An earlier version of this article appeared on Medium.com

How to be a culture maven: The Betsy, Miami’s South Beach

On bustling Ocean Avenue in Miami’s South Beach, there is a 1940’s era hotel called The Betsy.

3 Score’s guest blogger Paula Forman shared her experience there in 2017. This time I  joined her and two other friends for a mid-winter get-away.  It was the tonic we needed, but for reasons that surprised me.  Ready for an update?

I knew The Betsy to be a luxury hotel. I did not anticipate it to be such an oasis of cultureContinue reading “How to be a culture maven: The Betsy, Miami’s South Beach”

5 insider tips to ensure the best Airbnb experience

Duffel on apartment floor

Using Airbnb for the first time can be daunting. Concerns abound.  Maybe it’s just for kids, you think. Or,  you’d rather have the safety of a hotel.  Maybe as a solo traveler, the idea of an apartment is not inviting.  Questions arise. What if the apartment isn’t as advertised, or the location is near…..nothing. What if the host isn’t there to meet me? How do I get the keys? Who can I ask for restaurant suggestions?   You’ve got some questions, here are some answers to ensure the best Airbnb experience…. Continue reading “5 insider tips to ensure the best Airbnb experience”

How to find the best trip insurance at 60+

Travel insurance is a considered choice and, frankly, sometimes not necessary.  However, it is absolutely essential for an older American traveler with international destinations in mind.  The primary reason is adequate medical coverage.  Employer-based medical coverage may be sufficient (check your policy), but Medicare falls far short outside the U.S.  Supplemental “Medigap” policies will provide you with only very limited coverage if you become sick or injured abroad. Furthermore, you’ll want to protect your international travel investment against an array of mishaps, from lost luggage to unforeseen cancellations.   Here’s how to find the right travel insurance plan for you. Continue reading “How to find the best trip insurance at 60+”